The first step in letting things go is being able to accept that you need to let them go. For most, this is the problem: we hold on to things so tightly because of an uncontrollable fear. We fear that if we let it go, we would have no idea how to cope anymore. Take anger, for example: every day I work with people who have pent-up anger which they are so eager to get rid of, but when given the opportunity to let go of the anger, most of them don’t. The reason is fairly simple: because when we are angry, we have something to hold on to. It is much like a life raft that keeps us connected to the pain in our life and we believe that by letting it go, we are telling others that what they did to us was okay.
STOP! Letting go does not mean you are weak or you are now somehow putting an “okay” sticker on others’ hurtful behaviour. Letting go means we allow ourselves to move forward. So here are some things you should let go of in 2017.
This may seem like a ‘well duhhh’, but if I look at social media, I find it so interesting that 50% of the posts people are sharing are their memories of last year, with comments on how bad it was. This year, let go of ‘could-haves’, ‘should-haves’ and ‘might-have-beens’ and focus on the now.
- The busyness
We live in such a fast-paced world, in which we don’t have time to really look at what we are doing and how it is affecting our daily interactions. This year, make a point of letting go of the rat race and learn to do things because they befit you and your environment, and not just because they are what you have been doing all your life.
PUT OFF YOUR PHONE!!!! We have created a generation of smartphones and dumb people. It is sad that teachers have to tell parents to get off their phones when they come and collect their kids from school. Your child, spouse, friends and family want to spend time with you and connect with you IN PERSON, not just like your comment on Facebook.
- The fear
A new year brings its fair share of excitement and fears. Is this the year you are going to make your dreams come true? Is this the year you are going to ask for that raise, or that job, or opportunity? Will you succeed? Maybe, but it should be the year you at least try. Don’t let the fear of something possibly failing stop you from trying to make it a success.
- That negative attitude
Stop being that ‘Negative Nelly’ and develop an attitude of gratitude. Stop looking for what is wrong with the world and start seeing what is right with it.
- The pain and/or guilt
We have all experienced some pain in our past and have been carrying it with us from year to year. This is the year you dump that trash. By holding on to what has hurt you and refusing to forgive, you are effectively cutting your hand on the same knife, over and over again.